Are you wanting to become a statistic? Well, if you allow your marriage to go down the tubes, that’s exactly what’s going to happen. If your marriage ends, you’ll become one out three unions that end because one or both of you refuse to do the right thing.
Men, this may sound a little old fashioned but being a real man doesn’t mean how much beer you can drink or how many conquests you can hide from your wife. Grow up my friend. A wife needs a strong husband that will love, protect and be faithful to her. She also needs someone who cares about her more than himself.
The largest mistake a young man makes when he gets married is expecting to have a play thing for the rest of his life. Big mistake sir. God created her as a help meet with whom you have become one with. She’s meant to be the one who walks by your side and not your servant.
Ladies, this may sound a little old fashioned to you too but if your husband wants to be the man you crave, you need to support and encourage him. The biggest mistake a young bride makes is entering a marriage with the intent of changing him into what she expects him to be.
And here’s the biggey. You two are going to grow older. Sooner or later each of you are going to show it. Don’t fool yourself. Things are going to happen less frequently like sex. If she’s had kids, don’t be surprised if the little lady you married gets a bit more fluffy. It happens. Quit acting like it’s her fault. If she can loose the weight and is willing, you need to encourage her. He could use that type of encouragement too for that matter ma’am.
Marriage means the two of you are supposed to become one. Not only physically, but spiritually as well. There needs to be communication between you two, time spent together, and some re-sparking of that romance you probably thought you didn’t need any more.
Stand together and be of one mind when it comes to raising your kids. There is nothing more destructive to a marriage as being divided on how the kids should be brought up or even allowing the kids to divide you by playing one against the other.
Some of the strongest marriages, believe it or not, are those where husband, wife, and kids are in a good, bible based church together. Don’t knock it until you try it. It’s worked for my wife and I for the past forty years. Hey, I’m a preacher. You can’t expect me not to mention that.
Here’s the real formula to fix a broken marriage!
- Get yourselves in Gods House where the real Word of God is preached.
- Start listening to God’s Word. And not just listening, but studying it together.
- Start applying God’s Word to both of your lives.
- And watch God start fixing your marriage.
Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
This is great, Timmy!
Thanks Dwan…
I’ll add my two cents, especially for guys. Don’t make the same stupid mistake I did in my marriage. For various reasons, that I don’t feel like getting into, I had an affair on my wife several years back, just before becoming a Christian. Don’t do it, guys. I don’t care how bad you think your marriage is. I don’t care how great and attractive another woman seems compared to your wife. Messing around isn’t worth it. No illicit sex is worth the shame and regret you will carry the rest of your life. Yes, God can forgive your infidelity. Yes, your wife can forgive your infidelity. But, you’ll NEVER feel completely normal again, especially if others know what you did. You’ll wear that scarlet A the rest of your life. Do whatever you have to in order to improve your marriage BEFORE you cheat…
Smiling at my looking at both Timmy’s original post, which was excellent, and Aaron’s add on reply, Amen again to you both! Our pastor preached on marriage this last Sunday. He looked at my husband David and asked if he had any marriage advice. David said, “Well, if I see another woman I just say NO! I quickly replied, “Thank you!!!” Our choir director, a wonderful lady, gave me big thumbs up! David added, I” love my wife!” I replied, “And I love my hubby!” On June 19, Lord willing we will celebrate our 46th anniversary!
Last year, on our 45th anniversary, we celebrated with worship with Parson Timmy and Connie’s church. Our anniversary was on that Sunday. We had been asked to sing, and we did, but before we did. Timmy asked David something to the effect of how to have a long marriage. My goofy, or awesome hubby replied, “Well, first of all, you have to live a long time!” That brought the little church down, LOL, but we are all smart enough to realize that there is a LOT more to marriage than that!
Aaron, you are SO right when you say that when one has an affair, things are never again quite normal, even though both God’s forgiveness and that of your spouse are there for you! I haven’t had that experience, thank God, but I know many who have, and I see that is so true for them.
But this is also true of young kids who put the cart before the horse and jump into bed or the back seat of a car before walking the aisle and taking those wedding vows that are meant to be so sacred. So many kids find that their premarital sex just takes away from the kind of more emotional and spiritual respect that should grace relationship.
I just want to add, DON’T GO THERE!
Wow Dwan, what a wonderful comment. Thank you!!!